Codependencies
by HerNamewasAlice
Summary: In which Finn and Poe attempt to rehabilitate Rey after being stranded on an abandoned planet for the last eleven months.


They were initially careful.

When they crashed on this desolate planet.

They initially remained enemies.

Even when their ships were destroyed from the crash and left them stranded in the middle of nowhere.

They tried everything they could to get back to civilization.

Rey thought that all her years of searching for scraps would have helped her to make some contraption. She thought that Jakku was nowhere. But this place. This place _was_ nowhere.

They were initially careful.

After all she was stranded with the monster.

They kept their distance.

And she guarded herself.

When they first crashed, they were still at each other's throats. Hunger and thirst was what stopped them from fighting for an eternity.

It didn't take until days for them to realize there was no point in fighting.

For it was better to have someone in a place of nothing. It was better to have a presence than solitude confinement.

She drew a line on the ground.

And for some time that was law.

He was not allowed to pass the line.

They went on with their lives. As if the other didn't exist. She made a little home out of the broken ship parts and items she scavenged from this abandoned planet. There were fruits all around the planet. And water.

And she went about like she did in Jakku. She woke up. Made a tally mark and spent a majority of her day looking for food.

She drew a line on the ground.

But he crossed it.

* * *

Rey was missing.

The Resistance didn't know until weeks later when she never returned. The thing was people go in and out of the base for all types of things. Missions. Visits. Time alone. Rey went out to explore.

If she was out on a mission, the Resistance would have known sooner that she was missing. They monitored people on missions.

Finn regrets to this day that he never accompanied her the last day he saw her.

It's almost a year since her disappearance. Eleven months to be exact.

But the Resistance hasn't stopped searching for her.

He would never stop looking for her.

Force sensitive people feel her presence from time to time. That she's still there. Somewhere.

It drives him crazy to know that she's out there. Is she alright? Does she think that the Resistance has forgotten her? That he forgotten her? Does she know that people were looking for her? That people cared and loved her?

Does she think that they had abandoned her?

The idea of her being alone pains him because she had been alone her whole life. And for her to be away from people that cared for her, kills him on the inside. To spend nights awake wondering if she was safe.

Rey was a strong girl but things were different. She's not just any girl. She was a special girl. People know about her know and what if people were holding her hostage? What if they were hurting her? And that's why she hasn't managed to contact them?

Kylo had been missing as well -

What if she wasn't alive?

What if...what if -

He shook his head. No. He can't think this way. He won't stop looking for her until he found out the truth.

"We'll find her," Rose assured him.

He pulled his hand away from her. Finn doesn't want reassurance. He wanted to prepare himself for the worse.

"At least let me fly the ship for a while. You need to sleep," she bit her lip.

A portion of the Resistance have been searching for Rey. Going to planet by planet. Looking through every home. Finn had lost count on how many planets he had went to find her.

"I'm fine -

"You haven't eaten today either," Rose added, nudging him away and taking control. "You can't go on like this. Rey wouldn't want you to either." Finn had gotten thin since Rey's disappearance. He rarely eats now let alone sleeps. He used to keep himself clean shaven but things changed. He has a beard and his hair is shaggy. "Just lay down and rest. I can take it from here," Rose said firmly.

Finn sighed but obeyed.

Her skin tightened but she kept a straight face. Ever since Rey's disappearance, it's been straining their relationship. Rose cares about Rey but she's finding herself becoming less and less empathetic. Watching her boyfriend obsess over Rey. Refusing to sleep. Eat. Take care of himself or think about anyone else - had caused a drift.

* * *

Finn had imagined a million scenarios to the day he would see her again.

She would be alright and happy to see him. She would jump into his arms and hug him, unable to fight her tears.

Or she wouldn't be alright. She would be thin and bruised and forgotten everything. Who she was. Even him.

He imagined almost everything imaginable except for this.

He finds her in a shelter. A shelter she had made herself out of broken ship parts and scraps. She's all bundled up in a blanket but she looks disorientated. Hesitant. She's looking at him in confusion.

His skin tightened. Something was off.

He wanted to run and hug her in his arms but he stops himself. He doesn't want to overwhelm her when she's like this. "Rey...do you remember me?" he asked.

"Of course I do," she gave him a small smile.

He blinked and examined her. She looked fine. She's clean and in slightly worn out clothes but she looks healthy. Her hair was longer but it was shiny and soft. And maybe she lost ten pounds or so but she wasn't malnourished. But something about her felt off to him.

"I never thought I'd see you guys again," Rey said, smiling at the both of them.

"You've been here this whole time?" Rose asked.

Rey nodded. "This place isn't so bad. There's more resources here than Jakku."

Finn nodded. This place even though there was no one else was abundant in plant life and water. And seeing this place settles well with him.

Rey stood up to hug them but he still felt something was off about her.

Maybe it was because she had been away from human contact for so long. In Jakku at least she saw people and said hello to people passing by but here there was no one - but wouldn't she be more excited to see them?

"Let's go home," Rose said to her.

Finn eyed Rose and knew that she was thinking the same thing.

Rey's eyes flickered. "When?" her mouth twitched.

"Well...now?" Rose raised her eyebrow.

Finn found Rey's response odd as well.

"I need time to pack first - and -

"It's okay," Rose gave her a smile. "We'll give you time to pack -

Rose went silent as a man came into the shelter.

It takes a few seconds for Finn to process him. Dark hair. Dark eyes. Dressed in black. Cloak and all. Finn knew this figure very well. Finn doesn't hesitate to attack. "You've been keeping her this whole time -

"Don't," Rey said firmly.

Finn blinked at her. She sounded protective of him. The murderer.

The murderer remained unfazed by everything. Like always.

"He hasn't been keeping me at all. We both crashed here together."

Finn looked at her and then at him. And then he noticed something about Kylo. He had things swung around his torso. Fabrics - the fabrics Rey wore around her tunic. Finn didn't notice she wasn't wearing them until now. Kylo pushed his cloak back and revealed the fabrics were wrapped around his torso. There was a baby wrapped to Kylo.

Finn opened his mouth but paused when he realized there was another baby there as well.

Two.

There were two.

And they looked like him. The murderer.

Finn went pale.

"Rey," Finn said, locking his eyes on her in disbelief.

She nodded in affirmation. That the babies were hers and...his.

"What did you do to her?" Rose yelled at Kylo. "What did you do to her?"

* * *

_She drew a line on the ground._

_To indicate a barrier._

_To serve as a reminder._

_To tell him._

_To remind him._

_Of his boundaries._

_Of his limitations._

_He was not allowed to come near her._

_Kylo was unfazed by this little gesture of hers. There had always been a line between them before she even drew it on the ground. It was just a scratch on the dirt to satisfy her need to make clear that she was shutting him out._

_Or so he felt._

_As each day passed, the more he felt the weight of the line. _

_To watch her redraw the line - reminded him how much she didn't want him near her._

_To watch her every day do this, taunted him._

_That he was not allowed of her. _

_Every single day._

_Even when they were stranded._

_But he reminded himself that he was bound to cross the line. He knew from the beginning. He knew it from her hesitation. Her inability to look him in the eyes. It was only a matter of time when she'll let him near her._

* * *

Kylo remembers vividly on the night things changed. He woke up to moisture streaming from his face. It was strikingly similar when he experienced the rain with Rey during their first force bond.

_He feels something trickling from his cheeks._

_They were tears._

_Except they weren't his._

_They were hers._

_Being here for the last several weeks was getting to her. _

_"Let me see you. Let me see where you are," he calls for her. She's crying a lot and it's collecting down to his chin. "Rey," he calls out her name then. Searching. He remained in his shelter, static. He knows where she is. He knows where she's sleeping but he says this for her sake. For permission. Confirmation._

_She doesn't respond back but he feels it. The thought that was keeping her awake._

_He feels it. He sees it._

_"I would have bought you," he told her, looming through her thoughts._

_It was late at night and she was unable to sleep._

_He tells her this whenever her mind keeps him up. _

_She flinches from the possessive words that sounded so gentle._

_It's so strange to him that now that they were physically close to one another, they were still distant. _

_"And you would be mine," he continues. His voice is soft. Tangent. Tracing along her skin. It sounds like a verse from a lullaby. A lullaby he says to her whenever she needed it._

_"I'll keep you warm. I'll take care of you. I'll never let you out of my sight."_

_Rey sits up this time. Still in the dark. "What would you do with me?" she asks._

_Kylo's eyes flickered. He would do everything with her - everything that she allowed him. His body murmured from the sound of her voice._

_"Would you hold me?" her voice is low. Timid._

_Little girl._

_"I'll do everything you'll let me."_

_His answer settles well with her._

_"I hate you," she said. She hates the way she's drawn to him._

_"I know," he said softly. Those three words don't bother him anymore. "But in the end it doesn't even matter." _

_Kylo knows her._ _She likes the idea of belonging to someone. Being kept. She likes being held. Tended to. This side of her was something she did not understand. For she was strong. She was independent. She was self reliant. A fighter. But he did. He understood. She wanted to be taken care of. She was never taken care of. And sees this in him - the provider. She does not see this in FN-2187. Or anyone for that matter. But him._

_"Will you stay?"_

_He blinked. It was an odd question. He and her were stuck here - and yet -_

_"Even if we do get out of here - will you stay with me?" _

_She was giving him a proposition. An ultimatum. If he wanted to cross the line he had to give up everything. His title. His position. His rank. Just to be with her. His jaw twitched. _

_ "To be nothing like me. With me."_

* * *

_He goes to her. Without giving himself a second to breathe. _

_She's there, waiting for him in the dark. In her shelter._

_"Are you sure?" she asked him before he could touch her. They've touched before - but just hands. For a split second. "You can't leave if you agree - you can't change your mind," she's starting to cry again._

_He nodded quickly. "I won't," he tells her, wiping her tears with his fingers. He's half clothed. He didn't bother to put on the rest of his clothes. He just ran to her as fast as he could. He desperately wanted to touch her._

_"How can I trust you?" she feels it. His hunger. _

_He knows promises won't mean anything to her from him. He can tell her he loves her over and over but it won't do anything for her. She was left as a child. The word love frightens her. Love had so many false pretenses for her. False promises. And maybe the word frightened him as well."You're mine," he tells her. "You belong to me - consider this agreement as a form of payment for you."_

_He watches her relax then. She understands bartering better. She understands trade. "You won't leave?"_

_"No."_

* * *

"She's been in good hands," Kylo responded to her friends. He had been taking good care of her and her babies. The babies were his too but he felt they were more of hers. Even when they're wrapped to him, they were more of hers. "She is healthy and so are the babies," he stated plainly to them. He doesn't feel the need to explain anything else besides this. It was unnecessary. Unneeded.

"What are their names?" Finn asked, looking at them in awe.

"This one is Will and this one is Hope," Rey said with a smile. She always looked so soft when she was near their babies.

Kylo watched as Rose's smile vanished. "You...you gave birth alone here?"

"I delivered them," Kylo said then through gritted teeth. He says this so quickly to destroy the mental image that Rose had - a mental image of him leaving Rey alone to give birth by a stream. "I was there with her through the whole process." He counted the minutes with her labor. He remained calm while she was panicking. He cut whatever was necessary. And cleaned his children while her body was trying to process everything.

"Oh," Rose blinked.

"We'll have the doctors check your babies," Finn said to Rey. "Just to be safe that they're healthy."

"What?" Rey frowned.

"We're taking you," Finn paused. "...everyone back."

* * *

He observes her during the whole ride to the base. He sees it, the anxiety across her face. Kylo knew eventually they would be found but he knew that Rey felt the opposite. She spent her whole life waiting and she didn't want to do that anymore. She's silent, in disbelief that this was happening - that they were going back to civilization.

Kylo held on to their children - she insisted him to do so for she did not completely trust him.

_I wouldn't attack them_, he reminded her, looming into her mind. He knew damn well she was making him hold him in fear that he would do something violent.

She doesn't look at him. It's silent. But Kylo knew why. He can feel Finn and Rose's shock towards their children.

Will and Hope were asleep in his arms. Their children look exactly like him and he knows it makes the situation even more uncomfortable.

_Do you regret this? _He asks her.

She looks up at him then. _I don't._

_Now that we're found, you regret me, don't_ you? He doesn't hesitate to address the way her shoulders are tense and her face is creased. He senses it, the shame and embarrassment in her - that she let him in - that she let him touch her. The evidence was noticeable and loud. Apparent. The evidence looked exactly like him, just like him.

Rey shook her head painfully. _I don't regret you. I don't regret anything. _She means it, means every single word. They spent eleven months alone together and that was the first time in her life that she didn't feel lonely. _But I don't think anyone is going to accept what we did. _Rey looked down at her children and frowned. She loved her children but she knew it was going to be hard. She never thought they would be found and she never thought they would deal with the consequences of their actions.

_We've done worse_, he reminded her. _We've done so much worse._

Rey gave him a small smile. The fact comforts her. And it was true, they've done worse. He betrayed his master and she betrayed the Resistance. But the betrayal was harmless, just two little babies.

* * *

Finn and Rose were silent, ignoring the sight of Rey's silent interaction with Kylo Ren.

It was unsettling, to watch Rey touch Kylo's cheek - to see her fond over the children she had with him. Finn tried to focus on flying the ship but he couldn't. He couldn't help but to look at them. He knew that it had been eleven months but he didn't imagine that things would be different with her. Was she the same Rey? Or was she just like the monster now?

Rose exchanged a look with Finn.

Finn nodded and agreed that neither of them could be trusted.

* * *

General Organa was informed about the discovery in advance before they arrived. They wanted to prepare her, to the let the news settle in before she saw her son again. But it doesn't stop her from striking her son in the face.

Ben doesn't flinch. He kept his head down for a second before staring back at her.

"Do you want us to take Rey and the children to another room so you can have some time...to discuss with your son -

"No, I want her to hear this for herself," Leia said through gritted teeth at Poe.

Ben stood there, staring at her without any emotion. Without any empathy.

"How dare you touch her," Leia slapped him again. "How dare you do this to her!" she shouted back. "Rey is a good girl. She doesn't deserve any involvement with you."

"Leia," Rey went in between the mother and son. "He didn't force anything on me."

Leia's face fell. "He doesn't love you, dear," she said sadly, ending the poor girl's speech. Leia shook her head and sighed. "He doesn't love anyone." It hurt her to say it about her own son but she knew it was true.

Rey shook her head as she held her children tighter. "No, that's not -

"Ben doesn't care about you. You two were on that planet for a long time. He went into survival mode. He didn't spare your life because he loved you. He just needed you then. You were a convenience to him but once you're not, he'll dispose you. Like what he did to his own father," Leia watched as the young girl went into silence. Leia turned and looked at her son. "When I was notified that they found you, I was afraid you killed her. I didn't think you would be this cruel," Leia shook her head in disgust and anger. "Guards, take him away."

* * *

Leia couldn't help but to look at the children, her grandchildren. It had been such a long tie that she had been welcomed by the presence of light. They looked so much of Ben. The very fact of it didn't make it any better. "May I?" she asked. She was still, not sure what quite to do. Should she hold them both? Or one at a time. She watches Rey hesitate and then come to terms before agreeing. Rey gives Leia both of the children. She couldn't help but to be overwhelmed. The babies were so small and fragile. It was a miracle and blessing that the children were healthy from rural living conditions, but their mother was a scavenger. "They're so beautiful," she meant it. She really did. "How was it? Was he kind to you?"

"He was more than kind."

Leia looked up at her then. "You love him," she said slowly. Leia shut her eyes for a moment, attempting to conceal her sadness.

Rey nodded. Her eyes were shiny in the light, her lips were trembling. "I do," she swallowed hard. "And I know he loves me too. I feel it within me. I feel it with them," she stared down at her children in fondness.

"He will turn on you, he will," Leia's chest was constricting. She hated for speaking so ill of her son but she had to prepare this poor child.

Rey shook her head. She was calm, her face had softened in the coolest of blues from the shadows. Her eyes still glimmering in the light. "He won't," her voice was of a wisp. So much hope. Blind faith.

Leia pursed her lips and winced. She used to be like that, so hopeful and fiery but that was such a long time. She looked down at the children and then at the mother. "What makes you so confident?"

"He is a part of me and I'm a part of him," Rey smiled with pure joy. She was beaming, her face gentle. Leia couldn't help but to awe at the sight of a beautiful girl glowing. "He and I are a dyad. Two that are one."

Leia blinked. "I thought those don't exist anymore - they haven't existed in generations -

"He and I share the same soul, when we are together we are whole. And we are at peace," she chuckled, tears prickling from her face. But they were not tears of sadness or pain, they were tears of joy and pure relief.

Leia sees it, the girl's pain. This child had spent her life alone feeling empty and incomplete but when the girl was with Leia's son, it wasn't the case. Leia sees it, the happiness that filled the girl. This girl spent her whole life feeling something was missing but she doesn't feel that anymore. Leia knows this pain, it was the same pain as her son's. Leia's eyes flickered in realization. "I think I had always known," Leia began, smiling for the girl. She was slowly chuckling and then she started to laugh in relief. She hadn't laughed in such a long time. It all made sense. She was consumed with warmth and love. "I felt such a connection with you from the start, the same connection I have for my son. He's been so lost."

Rey nodded, swallowing hard. "So-so have I," she was consumed with so much emotion. She was crying again, tears of acceptance and growth. "I'm not alone anymore and I'll never will. He will always be with me."

"I've loved you as my own for the last few years," Leia handed the children back to her. She waited until Rey settled with the children. "It all makes sense. You are a part of him."

"I know you don't trust him but I will not be out here freely while he's locked up," Rey said gently. "His cell is my cell. His pain is my pain and I won't have it any other way."

"I understand," Leia smiled again. She hadn't smiled so much in so long. Before Leia could say another word, Rey goes to him.

Rey goes to him, she always did. Leia followed. She watches as the girl fastens her children to her body. Leia froze at the sight. Rey had always had fabrics wrapped around her, Leia always assumed this was part of her style from living in a desert planet. But that wasn't the case, Leia realized. Was the very reason of the fabrics for when Rey would eventually have children? So it'll be easier to carry them as she worked?

Rey ran to Ben and nearly goes on top of him to kiss him. Ben takes no time to wrap his arms around her and hold her firmly. He kisses her deeply as if it was his last time.

"I have so many questions," Leia breaks the moment.

Ben pulled away and frowned. Not in anger. Not in resentment or annoyance. But sorrow.

"I feel there is more to this story," Leia held her breath. She was examining the lovers. Rey was on his lap still, her fingers in his hair. Rey was soothing him but her eyes were lowering. The light that Rey was emulating was gone. His hand was on her waist, holding her as if there wasn't going to be another chance for this again. The sight frightened Leia. "You two stayed lost willingly."

"Yes," Ben answered. "We did."

"Why?"

He lets go of his lover and strokes his children's hair. His children were so small that he was able to touch them both at the same time with one hand. He keeps his eyes on them. He smiled at them lovingly. His children didn't have much hair but they will soon enough. "We've been having visions for some time," he sighed.

Leia's heart skipped a beat. "Of what?"

"How this war will end," he swallowed hard.

"Your son is a good man. He made you and Han proud," Rey spoke out then. For once Leia believes it, truly believes it by the pain etched in the girl's face. "It's inevitable how all of this will go."

Ben kisses Rey again but she cries as a response. "It'll be okay," he reassured her. He turned then to his mother. "We wanted some time before it. We are fully aware of how selfish of us to prolong this war but we wanted some time together."

"Why would you bring children into this world if you knew you were-were?" Leia's voice broke.

"To save the legacy of our family. To keep our line going. We wanted to experience a life together even if it was brief. So when I'm gone, she won't be fully alone."


End file.
